The Over 1 That Never Was
by TheShroudedProtagonist
Summary: A Nobody. Is nothing. Only a half of a person. If we were nothing, were we ever meant to be something? As a Nobody once trapped in a raining hell, who's side was I meant to take? Why did we have to be.. only 1/2 of a person? How long did we push...? When will we finally be complete? 1 over 1...
1. Day 1: Nothing

Well hello there! Welcome to my first bout of fictional fan writing!

First of all, I need to tell you all that yes, this is an Akuroku fanfic. Yes, there will be yaoi. Yes, this is slightly AU... and YES I USE RATHER SOPHISTICATED LANGUAGE. Allow me to apologize now for my short comings. I love you all, though, for clicking on this and I hope you enjoy it :)

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The /1 That Never Was

Day 1: Nothing

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I DON'T think I can say that my story has a definite beginning… or ending, for that matter. Even so, I think I'll have to start with something… Correction, I think I'll start with nothing. Yes, nothing.

In the beginning, there was _nothing_. I saw nothing, I knew nothing, I felt _nothing_. It's probable, though, in those first few moments of my life, I didn't need any of those things… I had no purpose to fulfill, no goals to achieve. For how can one reason and truly think when lacking the instruments that create clarity and thought? How can you witness without eyes? How can you speak without a voice? How can you do anything without a will to do so? I was merely an empty shell, the darkness that had shed itself from someone. _My _someone. Little did I understand, if comprehension _was_ possible at that stage, that all of this was true.

Time ticked itself away while I brewed thoughtless thoughts.

I wonder when it was, how long it had been, when that man's voice _rung _in the ears once useless to me. When I _saw_ his hands float up to summon shapes. Letters I could see with the eyes once unused. What was it that he told me? Ah, yes.

"…You seek answers…"

"…I can give you purpose…"

These words have always meant not a single thing to me, but I suppose those words held the bind of my destiny. Those couple sentences, I believe, were my true beginning. A beginning uncalled for, but a beginning, nonetheless.


	2. Day 1 Part 2: The Castle That Never Was

The /1 That Never Was

Day 1 Part 2: The Castle That Never Was

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THE MAN gave me the name "Roxas", a very odd name if you ask me… Odd, yet familiar — I remember feeling as if I had heard it somewhere before. But, how could that be true if I had no memories? It was quite baffling: a memory that I have no memory of…

After adorning me with a title, the man took me to a castle of bleach white, decorated with black emblems of a distorted heart. This place, covered with its insignias of contrast and shrouded by murky fog, gave off a most frightening aura. The kind of air about it where a little voice in your head tells you to run away, that danger would surely find you if you didn't leave…

The man laughed, as if to quell my suspicions. "Do not be afraid, Roxas. This is 'The Castle That Never Was'. This, new friend," he nodded to the ominous monument, "is your new home." He ended his statement with a faint smile, but an obviously fake one. At that exact moment, I began to fear that HE was more dangerous than that castle...

I simply couldn't believe it. Could he really have been serious? "New…home…?" I questioned with caution. Caution for many things: I didn't want to start off my impression with a disrespectful demeanor, and I certainly didn't want to seem ungrateful (for he was giving me a home, a life, a purpose). Other than reasons like those… strangely enough, I wanted to test my voice. I had this…unusual…anxiety my voice sounded off. I was…pleased (?) ...with my voice, actually. One fright gone, millions more to go—

He cut off my inner thoughts with a sound of slight irritation. "Yes, Roxas. Now come," the man said as he gestured me to follow, "It's time for you to meet the others."

Others? So there are more people like me… like him? I wasn't sure at that time if this was a good thing or a bad one…

He and I were striding through the castle hallways, him mumbling about the absence of someone and me not listening. Listening was near impossible when I was so entranced by the weird structure of this place. The walls so intricate… the structure of the building itself so complicated and—

I was cut off once more, but this time by a blue-haired man with an alarming scar on his face. "Here, take this," he commanded as he threw at me black bundles of clothing, "Put it on. With haste, now." I unfolded the articles to find a black jacket of some kind and slacks of the same color.

"That is the Organization's uniform, Roxas." the other man explained. "Here," he showed me to a room, "When you are done, come out and Saix here will escort you to the Round Room. Hurry now, we will be waiting." And with that the man left with another forged grin and I was shoved into a room to dress in their peculiar attire.


	3. Day 1 Part 3: Introduction to 13

Yesh! Thank you for continuing to read this!

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The /1 That Never Was

Day 1 Part 3: Introduction to 13

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"UMM… SA-Sa…" What was his name again? I thought. Saiku? Saku? I wasn't particularly good with names.

"Saix." The blue-haired man said, monotone.

"…Well, sa-sa..." I was getting rather frustrated. His name was far too difficult to say!

"Saix." He repeated in his colorless voice.

"Yeah, where…?" I was uncertain as to where we were going. Round Room? In truth, I was beginning to question everything up to this point: So, to recap, I WILLINGLY followed a suspicious black-cloaked man to his very guarded castle and now I'm following his apprehensive henchman without the slightest idea of where he was taking me? Oh, how naïve I was…

"We are heading towards the Round Room. This area in the castle is where all decisive matters are resolved between all members of the Organization. Yes, and before you ask, We are Organization XIII, currently made up of 12 members. Our primary goal is classified to you as of now, considering you have yet to be initiated. That is why we are traveling to the Round Room, if you will. Upon our arrival the topic of your initiation will be debated. Any other questions?" He stared forward, waiting response. "No? Very well, then."

Too afraid to ask the bleak man anything else, I was pensive the rest of the walk. I pondered about my safety. Would I immediately be initiated? What would happen if I wasn't? Would I be okay? Would they hurt me? All of these inquiries chilled me down to the core. Although I knew pretty much nothing of Organization XIII (or anything else), I could feel that killing was not unknown to the castle. To the man I was walking with. To the man with the false smile.

When we had finally reached the doors that opened to the Round Room, Saix finally spoke. "We are here. Now, Roxas, wait here patiently until my return. Oh, and some words of advice: Do not listen in, or 'eavesdrop', if you will. Do not speak unless spoken to. And most importantly, do NOT leave this very spot. Farewell." With this, Saix summoned a dark vortex of some sort and hurried inside it, abandoning me in the desolate, dim corridor. Deserted and unaware of the ongoing situation, I stood tolerantly and awaited Mr. Saix's arrival, just as I was instructed. Even so, I couldn't help peering around the hallway, glaring at its seeming endlessness. How far had I walked with the blue-haired man I knew so poorly? How far away was the exit to this immense castle? Could I… could I…?

No. I was not about to contradict my decisions. What point would I have proven if I had simply left? Most importantly, if I had tried to escape, would I even be able to?

Unexpectedly, I felt a hand drop onto one of my shoulders. Puzzled by the action I had sensed, I was about to question who it was, in the motions of a head-turn. A demanding voice shot from behind me, preventing my movement.

"Nu-uh. Slow down there, buddy. I was sent to tell you, more like congratulate you, on your initiation! Now, just walk yourself through those doors down there, Number 13!"

I was confused. "Who are…?"

"That's… not important… But, what is important is that you get in there before the boss-man gets steamy. Come on, I'm going with you." The stranger ended his statement with a gentle push towards the door. Obedient and ignorant, I followed his instructions, not taking even the tiniest glance back… Once again, it would only be foolish to turn back now. I was still curious, although, so I attempted my question yet again.

"Who are you?" I breathed, continuing my trek forward.

A thin laugh was the stranger's response. "And here I thought you had it memorized… It's nice to see you again, Ven…"

Huh? Oh, my list of bafflement grew longer with every second! "What?" I asked the person, wondering what he had meant.

"Oh, never mind me! Just forget about it." The stranger mumbled.

Oh, well. If he told me to forget, I guess it wasn't worth remembering. I dropped the thought as I opened the entrance, flinching when a bright grey beam flashed as a result. I halted my steps, trying to adjust to the abnormal lighting, but the person shoved me, causing me to keep ambling along. That's overcompensation; I was more like scrambling my way around. With questions and doubts and worries, it was near impossible to purely focus on getting to a destination. Not only this triggered my uneasiness; I could feel the stares of others on my bowed head as we headed for what looked like an emblem, engraved at the center of the metal floor. Sure enough, as I got to the mark, the stranger tugged on one of my sleeves, signaling me to stop.

Upon my arrival, a voice of power and experience, that of the man who discovered me, bellowed my name.

"This is number 13, Roxas. Welcome, new comrade." His voice hesitated for a glint, and I took the chance to lift my head and glance at him. He was wearing one of his imitation grins, his dark orange eyes examining mine mysteriously. His stare was too intense for me, so I swiftly shifted my head back down.

He spoke this time to the stranger. "Good job. Well, 8, what are you waiting for? A new member like him can't place himself on his lonesome! Lend him a hand. Oh, yes, and remember what we spoke of earlier? Get it done."

The stranger retorted lazily. "Yeah, yeah, boss." Another of the dark vortexes appeared succeeding his words, the only difference being that this one was under my feet!

I ended up on a very high chair, staring down upon the emblem embellished floor. A floor that, oddly enough, didn't yield the other person who was with me. Where did the person go?

I sighed. The person did tell me to forget about them, correct? Forget is exactly what I did. My head moved to a different subject of thought. New questions flooded my mind.

So, they weren't going to hurt me? Even with my conformation as the new member, I still had a feeling, a feeling that running away would be a better option than staying here. I was quite nervous, but I was not about to disobey them now. I silenced my thoughts and listened closely to the conversation.

"Pitiful Heartless, mindlessly collecting hearts. The rage of the Keyblade releases those hearts. They gather in darkness, masterless and free... until they weave together to make Kingdom Hearts. And when that time comes, we can truly, finally exist! This boy, Number 13, is the key to bringing our goal to realization! For it is he that can harness the power of the Keyblade. He who holds the fate of the Organization in his hands!" It was Saix who said it.

All at once, foreign, unknown eyes of all shapes and sizes shifted their focus my way. It was then that I realized that, even while people were all around me, that I was completely alone. I took a glance at every pair of eyes and every one of the 11 sets was cold. Unforgiving, uncaring, unhopeful, unfriendly eyes. Wait… 11 pairs? I looked around again; I remember seeing the golden-lava colored eyes of the man who brought me, the lively yellow eyes of a man with a ponytail, the distant, violet eyes of a giant man, the toxic-green eyes of a blonde man, the stark blue ones of another colossal man, the thoughtful blue eyes of a stale-blue haired man…The yellow eyes of Mr. Saix… Wait… There's an empty seat by him? Didn't Saix say that all members attend the meetings?

What happened to that person? Is that person alright? Why, of all people sitting in the Round Room, was that person missing? Could it have been the mystery person?

I continued my inquiry even after the end of the meeting.


	4. Day 1 Part 4: The Stranger

The /1 That Never Was

Day 1 Part 4: The Stranger

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COMING TO a close in the aspect of my thoughts was problematic. I concluded, however, that I could not sit there and think forever or I would be left behind to rot, high above the metal floor of the Round Room. Searching for the familiar face of Mr. Saix, the man who had transported me to very opening of the round room itself, I peered around the room. Not long after I slowly began to grasp that no one was seated in any of the high-risen chairs except for me.

Anxiety and dread gradually poured themselves into my veins. How was I going to ever leave the chair? Was I to be doomed with a solitary life upon my pedestal for the rest of eternity? No, no that couldn't be! Surely… surely Saix would come to my rescue and…and…

I forced myself back to reality; in reality, Saix had matters of utter significance, of 10 times more urgency than removing me from a simple chair —the most undersized seat in the Round Room, in fact…

"The shortest…in the room?" I thought aloud as I stared in a ground-ward direction. "…maybe I can jump down…"

To side or not side with my reflections... It was a difficult choice, but my thoughts had given me hope, so I decided to give the bound a try. It didn't seem that far a distance, anyway, so what was there to fear? Humoring my beliefs, I wrapped my hands around along the sides of my chair and pulled up my legs so that I could ever-so-slightly crouch. Then, with utmost carefulness, I stood up and prepared myself. With my body in position and my head clouded with optimism, I propelled myself into the air.

At first I felt confident that I would land unharmed. Silly me… It was in that same moment that I realized that I was losing height over the air and was now plummeting face-parallel instead of billowing at an alarming rate.

"…stupid…" I whispered angrily as I braced myself for the sure crash head-first into the ground. As I had expected, I immediately felt excruciating, crippling pain rippling throughout my entire body. Moving was out of the question…Screaming out for help was near impossible. Breathing was becoming challenging… My mind reeled as the pain penetrated me. My senses were hazy, yes, but I…I then made out the sound of someone… vaguely familiar…

A gasp. "Huh? Oh, geez… You have to be fucking kidding me..." followed by fast steps my way… I felt hot hands… untrustworthy, alien hands… wrapping around my knees and head, hoisting me up into unfamiliar arms… Sudden movement… running? I tried to wriggle away…

A sound of disappointment escaped the person's lips. "Don't be insane! Quit it!"… It was… the voice of authority from before… To this insight, I stopped.

Now I was interested… who…? I glanced up to take in the image of a blurry figure… I squinted and tried to force my focus, but all I could see were flowing locks of flame and the rims of a pair of eyes. This was not enough; I was determined to see the whole face of my savior. I reached one of my mangled hands, despite the unbearable pain, up to the stranger's face and cupped it round the person's cheek, in an effort to receive full attention. The jostling motion came to a halt and, just as I had planned, the face looked down to me. To my surprise, although, it was warped with an expression of puzzlement… Reaping the prize of my scheme, I gazed deeply into the face's narrow, luminous emerald eyes… they were of a female's… I suppose… As I gaped at the lineaments of the person, I came to find that her eyes were… they were…

"…beautiful…" I airily whispered out my thought. For an abrupt second I felt a flash of heat underneath my palm as the eyes widened then tapered again… Her lips, another feature I could see, stretched a touch into a heart-warming grin... How odd… this smile was so much more different, compared to the counterfeit ones of the man who had discovered me. This one was sincere… overflowing with kindness... I slowly slid my hand down to the person's lips and felt a strange shudder from the person…

A recognizably thin laugh. "If you don't stop, you're going to end up killing the both of us…" Resulting in another smile…

No longer able to withstand the pain and happy with what I had accomplished, I dropped my limb and gave in to the smog of my mind… I wasn't sure if the running had continued or not, not aware at all on where we were headed… I was completely overcome by the fog, but the one thing I knew for sure was that I enjoyed being in her hands… I smothered myself in the person's warmth, burying my face into her arms…

"Four reeling trucking mute…" Was all I could comprehend of her next bout of speech… Huh? I was bewildered at her comment, certainly, I didn't say a thing, though; the agony was getting worse and I began to feel sleepy… I started to close my eyes…

She said something, more like shouted something at me… perhaps she was irritated towards my bleary aura… Nonetheless, I still wanted her to speed up her pace…

Before I knew so, my wish was granted as the outsider opened a door to a well-lit room, carefully laid me onto a soft piece of furniture, and casted a spell…

"Heal." A blaze of green light appeared around me and I was healed.

I sat up on what I could see now was a bed and was initiating a well-deserved 'thank you so much' to my knight in shining armor, so to speak, but she was gone… Of all the rotten luck!

"Oh well…" I stated, solemnly to my own ears. I figured that what had happened happened and that I would have a chance to express my gratitude to the stranger some other day.

But... when? When would I ever get the chance to see her interesting lineaments again? When would I be able to talk to her, get to know her? When would she become more than just a stranger to me? It was then I decided that, no matter what it took, I WOULD see her again. Why was I so persistent, you ask? She made me feel like no one else in this castle had…

This person, a true stranger among strangers, made me feel like I wasn't alone even in a world full of uncertainties.


	5. Day 2: A Someone's Keepsake

The /1 That Never Was

Day 2: A Someone's Keepsake

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I SAT quietly, observantly, reflectively, that entire night. It's very hard to believe, I know, but sleeping that night was, in truth, impossible. My mind was too occupied with contemplations on the mystery person and questions as to my location.

'Where am I? Does this room… belong to someone? If not, is it mine?' I remember thinking as I scanned the area, trying to identify it. It looked like a bedroom; it was stationed with all the necessities such as a bed, a closet, and a dresser, but it was incredibly tasteless. Stark grey walls, no, stark grey EVERYTHING, and not a single touch of personality or originality… The only person that could have inhabited it, based on my knowledge at that time, was Mr. Saix, so why was I put there? I raked my brain for answers, but found none.

"I guess… I'll just have to wait… to ask someone else…" I whispered to myself, with the smallest of hopefulness that maybe… maybe my voice would cause someone to pop out of the entry and initiate something, something I longed with all my being for: an explanation. All of the occurrences so far were just… just ensuing too fast for me to truly understand, to be able to see the outlook of whether my decisions were made in good humor. If only somebody could tell me if what I was doing was right… Or possibly… most likely, my wish was simply a cry out for company; I felt as desolate, as isolated as the room I was situated in. Also, the sudden contact with another person, that person who had rescued me, and then their abrupt disappearance left me aching for more. It seems as fast as I had first sensed companionship was as fast as I had regained the knowledge of loneliness. I yearned so much for someone to talk to, anyone to converse with.

No one came.

Even so, slowly, but surely, time passed...

It had been ages by the time a heard a rapping at the closed opening of the room. Millennia when I saw a fraction of a figure through the small window there.

"13? It is me, Saix. Won't you come and let me in?" A typical flat voice commanded from outside. I raised my head with a hollow feeling of glee. Mr. Saix had finally come to shed light on things! With a burning eagerness I strode to the door and opened it to take in the refreshing image that was blue hair, yellow eyes, and a blank, expectant face penetrated by a shocking central scar.

The eyes did not lower themselves to greet mine, but instead the semi-frowned mouth spoke. "Good morning, 13. I hope you had a restful sleep. I heard from…a certain someone… you had a tiny accident last night, correct?" He paused for a moment; however he did not look down to me. "You are fine now, I expect. Now, to more important matters," out of a pocket in Saix's coat emerged a sheet of paper, rolled up and tied with a minute string. This line was pulled away as the man stretched the paper out and took a gander at it. From my point of view, it looked somewhat like a blue print.

"This is a map, 13. Today I will be showing you around the castle premises. This is a vital task; it will ensure that you know your way around the castle, eliminating the need for personal escorts, or what some call 'babysitters'. With this said, 13, pay close attention and try not to let your mind wander. Do you understand?" His speech halted once more, but again, mysteriously enough he still did not set his view upon me. I sensed a bit of sarcastic tension emanating from Saix, it was so much so that I could have even gone as far as to say it carried touches of spite. This detail added with the oddity of him not looking at me made me think that Saix… disliked me. Was I really receiving hate from Saix? No, that couldn't be possible. Perhaps he was irked at the chore at hand: showing a useless trainee around…

"Let us begin. Oh, yes, and if you've any questions, feel free to ask. Or rather, you ARE free to ask." Saix concluded his beginning statement with a tiny smirk of some sort and then gestured to the door behind me. We are starting here? Should I ask? No, it would be best not to; Saix was a bit intimidating and I feared interrupting him…

"This is our starting point- Room 13. This, 13, is your personal bedroom. This is where you will be sleeping. Furthermore, you may ornate your room as you please, just make certain that your designing does not harm anything in any way. This is all covered in the Organization's book of Rules and Regulations, a volume of literature I will be handing you at a later date. Shall we proceed?" Saix questioned, an obvious rhetorical as he proceeded to the next room.

The blue-haired man continued to show me around the section of dormitory spaces, ascending in number. Saix's explanations were very tedious, and not even close to the clarifications I had wanted. He had yet to reply to the question of why I was here, or what the Organization was about, or even a simple answer as to what I would be doing the day after this. I was partly bothered by the discovery that he wasn't going to answer any of these, for I hadn't asked. But, why did I have to ask? Did he not have the consideration to tell me? Didn't he think I was even the least bit bewildered as to all of this?

Lost once again in my classic cycle of probing questions, I was, in a way, ignoring Saix. He continued his descriptions, (unbeknownst to him) to himself. I hadn't noticed this until I was heaved out of my head by a striking image of a person that I had captured looking through the window of a door, entry to Room 8.

It was her. There she lay resting, on the bed of her room; face down, her hair of fire projecting outwards. Her body was only half-way blanketed and she was shirtless, giving me teasing glimpses of her bare back, but nothing else. I began to analyze her figure. The stranger was incredibly thin, lanky, to say the least. She didn't look much like a woman... and by the way she slept—without the decency to put on a top —, I could tell she didn't act much like one, either. But why?

Following a stretch of speech from Saix, when I perceived was safest to ask, I opted to question this unique behavior. "Saix, why isn't that lady wearing a shirt?" I said in the interrogative fashion, shyly, as I pointed to the person.

The reaction wasn't at all what I had expected to receive ever from Saix.

A smile and soft chuckles illuminated Saix's once dull expression as he too gazed into the window. His tone was one that I had never heard before: it was warm, reminiscent; something that would appear extremely unlikely for a boring, blunt and cold man like him. "That's Axel, alright. Not afraid to show off…" His sentenced trailed off, almost as if he forgot I was there. In his own world, I presume, but I could see a slight red shade brush his cheek bones as he bit his lip a bit.

What was he thinking about…? About her figure? Never mind that, he just revealed her name! Axel. What a pretty name…

"Axel." I tried out her name. "A pretty name for a pretty person… Hey, Mr. Saix, do you think she's… I mean, Axel's pretty, too?" I wondered aloud to Saix, trying to understand his sudden softening aura. Another unexpected twist showed its ugly face as Saix's warmth was shattered. All at once, every kind gesture destroyed.

I had set off an explosive. "What was that, 13!?" His eyes burned like amber fire, his blue locks spiked up as he roared and wrathfully seized me by the part of my coat nearest to my neck, dragging my small form up to his infuriated face that bared teeth.

I was never so afraid. I feverishly reached for his hand that was binding me, holding me, strangling me, as I gasped for breath.

"Sa-sa!" I whimpered between struggled pants.

He didn't falter his acidic words nor did he loosen his grip. "Don't you EVER, EVER talk about Axel, MY Axel that way AGAIN! You don't have the right! Who the HELL do you think you are!? You little piece of SH-"

Without warning, to stop Saix's hurtful bombs in word form, a hand wrapped around the wrist of the limb gripping me. "Saix, what could you possibly be doing! Let him go this instance!" It was the man who brought me. I was slowly placed down and I collapsed to the ground, wheezing for air.


End file.
